Why do rules exist and how to educate my children in the way I see them? This question has been rounded my mind ever since I became a mum.
I am a “free human being” by definition, which means I usually struggle with rules….and even though I am convinced that children need a frame to refer to as well as some rules in order to develop with self-confidence, this topic is one of my main paradoxes regarding raising up.
A year ago, I bumped into this shop window in Copenhagen and this message really resonated in me: RESPECTFULLY ignoring the rules.
Why should we sometimes ignore the rules or simply not respect them? When can we do that? And how should we do it?
My purpose is obviously not to convert this post into a call for anarchism! Let’s look at the 3 main benefits for applying this message to our lives.
The first one is clearly the feeling of complete freedom that we can enjoy whilst ignoring some rules. When I was a child, I often heard my dad and grandma telling me off for using “inappropriate language for a girl”. I used whilst growing up to answer provocatively “Who said so?..and I have to admit that I love saying unexpected things in the most unexpected moments because I am jumping the rules!
For me, this is exactly the same as the level of communication you are “allowed” to have within your company. Who decides who you should be entitled to speak directly or no? Of course, respect means that we should always involve in a way or another our direct manager so that he/she does not feel escalated and is part of the initiative. But why should we follow so many unwritten rules?
The second reason is creativity. My children see so many things in a way I don’t. This clean and fresh look is the result of not having barriers and I believe this is one of the most beautiful treasure in life. How many of us, adults, are shaped by rules and visions that actually are blocking us from seeing and using our full potential?
The third reason is non conformism. “If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you are right” Henry Ford. I believe we should develop this attitude in everyone: not accepting everything that is written or simply generally approved. Following the rules strictly means – according to me – less capacity to take distance and therefore chose consciously what we really want to do.
What about you? Which rules do you ignore? Which benefits do you get from doing that?